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Megan Haldane

Interview in LA

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In the mid 1970′s I began studying with Alexander (Lex) Grey, M.A., Dip. Ed., Adv Dip. T’ing. He came from New Zealand where he had, amongst other things, introduced Child Development Programmes and courses at various Colleges and Universities. In Australia he was consultant to Sydney and Monash Universities on Early Education Programmes. I met him through The Sydney Playgroup Association when he was teaching a course at Sydney University’s Department of Adult Education on Early Childhood Development and Education. I studied with him for four years ending in 1980.

 

The course in child development was a study of children and how they develop within the structures of family, early childhood and further education and the community. The courses included a strong focus on cultural differences and considerations amongst the New Zealand Maori and Australian Aboriginal peoples. Of all the training I have done I value above all the knowledge I gained from Lex Grey’s insistence on his students learning how to observe children. I was engaged in this for nearly three years, observing and recording the way children communicate in order to get their needs met, and learning as an adult how to meet these needs based on the observation. Lex would use his course teaching very effectively because his students were deeply and effectively engaged in observing children. With observation as the base we learned about the development of the mind, mentality and the body in children. When you study children for a few years you gain great insight into the human psyche purely through observing or being involved in their engagement in play where they learn to gain skills and socialise. In this course our core text was titled ‘Learning Through Play’. All observations were done whilst children were playing or engaged in an activity which they regarded as play. Along with this I myself learned how to develop objectivity and gained a great body of knowledge as I became aware of my own preconceived attitudes and values toward the developing child. These children grow into adults and these are the people I see for therapy now. Without such a thorough education in child development I could never work to the level I do with adults.

My second teacher, Julie Henderson, Ph.D. came from the USA and at the time I met her was, amongst many other things, working as a somatic psychotherapist in Sydney. She is the author of a number of books including The Lover Within. I first saw her for supervision and further training in my somatic psychotherapy practice and also became her student participating in workshops and teachings both direct and indirect. Julie’s background and education were involved in a number of sciences, theatre, languages and various psychotherapies. She had many influential teachers including Milton H Erikson M.D. Richard Bell Ph D.,Tony Richardson MD, Kath L Kain and Robyn L Speyer. I make a special mention of all of these educators and practitioners as their work and influences as embodied in and imparted through Julie had a strong influence in the development of my own work as a somatic psychotherapist. Julie supervised me in my psychotherapy practice for four years. These supervisory sessions were shared with three other therapists and therefore were invaluable in helping me see how others worked and in differentiating and developing my own attitude and style. It also afforded me many more hours of observation and learning.

My third teacher was the late Robyn L Speyer. Robyn, from Australia, was trained in London by the neo-Reichian therapist Gerda Boysen. Having finished supervision and training with Julie Henderson I began further supervision and personal training with Robyn in her expertise in biodynamic massage and gentle body work in psychotherapy. Robyn had very special qualities. As a supervisor she imbued me with her essential qualities and knowledge which allowed me to just think of what she may do in a particular situation with a particular person in therapy and an answer would come immediately. We spent many hours where I learned her skills in touching mind through body and body through mind. She was an extraordinary teacher and I miss her a lot. She supervised and taught me for three years.

Actually my teachers have been many and varied and, as is often stated, life itself can be our most easily accessed and greatest teacher. That is true if we know how to handle it. I was a good learner in life from a young age and with my particular kind of mind I always had a great desire to become very knowledgeable, and hopefully, wise. I do now think I have gained a bit of wisdom. My own experiences in life have taught me well. My early family experiences I remember well and understand exactly how much they formed me. My adult life brought me to having children and this changed the course of my life completely. From the moment my daughter was born I had a deep realisation that children have particular needs, the biggest being the need to be treated with love and kindness. A parent needs to know what is happening for the child. In the early years I was a bit out of touch and truly overwhelmed by the responsibility. Since then I have devoted most of my attention to learning everything I could find out about being a human. I particularly focussed on the aspect of child development and my work with Lex Grey, as mentioned previously, was the most beneficial undertaking in support of my quest.

Along the way I worked in other areas but they always lead me back to children and their development. Just being a mother took up much of the time and I truly enjoyed being involved in their growing years. They have been eternally inspiring and exquisitely interesting just because of their growth and development from babies to adults in their individuation process. For some years I worked in the area of women’s health. The set up of a women’s collective in a health centre in Sydney gave me a formidable opportunity to train and learn. We operated on a principle that all women were equally entitled to train and practice in their particular fields of interest. Our teachers were our co-workers and professionals invited from many organisations who gave training in courses on anything from tai chi to crisis counselling, both of which I didlearn incidentally. I became a crisis counsellor for the many women who sought our services. The most exciting and fulfilling thing I d id though,was team up with a wonderful woman who invited me to sit in on her paramedic clinics. I had met her when she was attending my sister who was having a home birth. I learned an amazing amount from her due to her great generosity and belief in learning from each other as women equally devoted to women’s health. I learned how to do pap smear tests and I learnt a great deal about all facets of women’s reproductive and gynaecological health. After being fully trained as a consultant for contraception I ran clinics for young women about how to use ‘barrier’ methods as many women did not want to take oral contraceptives. Prescriptions for those were left to the Doctor of course who incidetally supervised us at all times. After one year of training I was running my own clinics and continued for three years. I loved that work which lead me onto my next great interest which was pregnancy and birth. Just before I left the women’s centre I did a shiatsu massage course and becam e very interested in the connection between the body and mind. I also saw that offering women crisis counselling was sufficient for a time of deep crisis but there was no chance for follow up work and I decided to train as a psychotherapist so that I could help men and women with their life difficulties.

At this time I was invited to a couple of home births and a deep interest and desire was ignited within me. I wanted to help women to manage pregnancy and support them in giving birth. For the next six years, along with training to be a psychotherapist, I put a lot of time and training into this area of pregnancy and birth. My interest and focus was that women and babies have the most positive experience possible and a safe outcome. I became particularly interested in women being able to have their babies at home. I apprenticed myself to a number of home-birth midwives and also one obstetrician. I began a marvelous journey of learning by attending and assisting at many births. In fact, during that time and also since then I have attended three hundred births. As well as that, I saw the majority of those women through their ante natal and post natal phases and was present for the full duration of their labour and the birth itself. This continuum of care was rather unusual and very beneficial for the babies and mothers, indeed the whole family. I taught birth preparation and parenting classes for some of those years. Although it was tiring and sometimes hard to be on call twenty four hours a day for every day of the year I found those years to be some of the most exciting, joyous and liberating of all.

 

Eventually as I began to see people for psychotherapy and I could not be ‘on call’ anymore I only attended births for people who were close or connected to me culminating in being with my daughter as she gave birth to two girls at home in her own bedroom leaning over her own bed! … our twin grand daughters, so beautiful and graciously eased into the world. My two grand sons were also born at home. I have been very privileged to have helped many women who, through giving birth, have created a greater belief in themselves, working their bodies and minds to the fullest as they broke through resistances and barriers in their most confronting moments whilst they were often in great pain giving birth to their babies. These women are my heroes. I hope I have served them well. Through their courage and efforts I have been encouraged and enabled to carry what I learned from them , their partners , their babies and their families to my work as a therapist where I have been able to help many people to come to a greater understanding of their situations and lives. These birthing women showed me truly heroic displays of endurance, courage and effort…that anything is possible. Because of them, I carry a confidence and belief about super human-ness which is exactly what many people need to come through their therapy because it can sometimes be extraordinarily difficult and painful. I can support them to finish with a far greater understanding about themselves, their lives and the lives of those around them.

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